Thursday, July 29, 2010

WHY WE CHEAT

Relationships in my opinion, is life's biggest test. If we pass, it ends up in marriage... If we fail, it ends up in heartbreaks and more. Most of us love being in Love.... It is easy at first with all the excitement of the chase, the mystery surrounding your love interest and the escalating sexual tensions and somehow we pray those moments last forever but then, there comes the fights, the tensions and then we begin to question if the end-all cliché applies: Are they the one? But before your eyes wander too much, think about the 80/20 Rule and see if your relationship is measuring up. Which I first heard about in TYLER PERRY'S MOVIE, WHY DID I GET MARRIED.... The 80/20 Rule is simple.Nobody is 100% perfect and neither is any relationship 100% perfect. In a healthy relationship, you get about 80 per cent of what you need/want from your partner and that is what will make you decide to date them to begin with.It could be their attitude, the interests you share and how caring, respectful and smart they are, but then you meet someone who catches your attention for an unknown reason. It may well be because they fulfill the missing 20 per cent in your relationship – The 20% percent is usually characterised by the sexual component. It is that thing that makes you choose what you WANT and not what you NEED. It is what makes you cheat on a perfectly loving man/woman with a no gooder!!! That 20% make us quick to conclude, “Hey, this person has everything I am looking for in a partner and more.” This can be a relationship killer because you are messing up an 80% good relationship for a 20% one when it's your genitals talking, not your brain Ever bothered to wonder why we are often okay with our relationships till we meet that new person??/ It is there we often see all the flaws in our partners.... We suddenly notice how he/she talks too much, chews with his./her mouth open, doesn;t dress half as fab as the new man/woman...."Cos during the good times in a loving relationship, the other 20 per cent doesn’t really matter because you don’t notice it missing. You are content and fulfilled with your partner. Your 80 per cent feels like 100 per cent. When you are in an argument, however, then the 20 per cent is tossed into the limelight. This isn’t to say that you should stick with the current partner if he/she is so not worth you cos you might only be getting the 20 per cent in the relationship instead of the 80% you so deserve, anyway. In this case, if you are truly miserable, maybe you should shop around cos who knows where your 80% is hiding (wink! wink!!). The point is to look at your relationship and really question it is worth holding on to. If it isn't and you feel really unsatisfied, then move on and find someone who can offer you more cos then you are mistaking you 20% for your 80%. Remember, a key element to any relationship is honesty – not just to your partner, but yourself. I have learnt that the 80/20 Rule explains some of the mysteries of relationships. It makes sense why players go after the 20 per cent while trying to hold on to the other 80 per cent. Or why people like me, will be in a very loving relationship and still be crushing on another dude (That;s cos I see the 20 in him) And I have even grown to understand even the “players,” who jump from one 20 per cent adventure to another in a vain attempt to eventually equal 100. If your relationship is going through a rough patch, think about the 80/20 Rule. Before dumping him/her and switching partners, be careful since you might be giving up your 80 and settling for a mere 20. First look at what you have instead of focusing on what is missing. Just remember, don’t throw away a good thing for a piece of new ass. (This is the point where i insist my blog isn't a relationship blog o_0)

7 comments:

  1. Hi, I fully understand the 80/20 rule but honestly that is from a woman's perspective but in a real man's perspective it the 20/80 where sex is very vital to a man then all the other qualities follow. Well it can be illustrated with seeing a nice and attractive restaurant but when you tase the food they serve you and it doen't meet your standard you find some where else to eat. So it is with men, women have to take time to understand how God created men, altough I am not justifying any player's actions but Men will always be men. To keep a good man by your side always it is good sex and all the other qualities follow.....Pin a man down with good bedroom ativities and let him fall in love with you. I am also not siding with pre-marital sex but our generation need to be educated on these important issues which will save a lot of broken homes occuring....Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. great piece Naa.luv it

    ReplyDelete
  3. @ Oye, nope it isn't... it is just about stuff i wanna talk about and too bad now i want to talk about relationships.lol

    @ Nancy, i agree with you tho however, the 80/20 rule isn't really about sex, it is about what makes you hold on to your relationship and what makes you want to let it slide. It is about whether the relationship is worth it or not... It is whether the relationship is worth your stress or not...simple!!!

    @ Sanny, thanks

    @ Tetekai, thank you

    ReplyDelete
  4. me liking this piece!!! :) since u not ready to publish..maybe jus maybe, i'll collect ur memoirs n publish them on ur behalf. then i can apply the 80/20 per cent rule in terms of the book sales. So i go in search of the 80, the rest is up for grabs :D

    ReplyDelete
  5. If you want your ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend to come crawling back to you on their knees (no matter why you broke up) you need to watch this video
    right away...

    (VIDEO) Win your ex back with TEXT messages?

    ReplyDelete